Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
