I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
