pedialite and red bull = repair kit
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
