i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
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