A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
