So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
