You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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