It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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