when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
