Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
