Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
He felt like a one man threesome
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Randomize
