I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
I have feelings that need drinking.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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