Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
