i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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