Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
