We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
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