you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize