Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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