you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
it glows. i had to have it.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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