i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize