i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
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