He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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