I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
