what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
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