Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
