I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Randomize
