he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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