Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
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