spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
