its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize