Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
