we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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