Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Randomize
