Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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