just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
