I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
