I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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