shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Randomize