I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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