Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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