Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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