I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
You may now shotgun with the bride
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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