the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize
