Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
