I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
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