break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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