no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
