so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
