Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Randomize
