yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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